Before I go to bed tonight I wanted to jot down some of my feelings today. I don't think today could've gone much better if I tried. I tried to savor every moment and every feeling with each new activity. We kept things super simple this year and I'm so glad we did.
Last night I made my very first holiday dinner. We skipped out on the crazy chaos of Christmas Eve with cousins to stay home and have some quality family time with the kiddos. I made turkey, mashed potatoes, spinach salad, green beans, and Adam's favorite jello pretzel salad. The girls requested candles, so I decided to go all out and did the whole table cloth, china, goblets thing. Fortunately for me, everything turned out great. I was pretty proud of myself and the kids were SOOOO excited to use all the fancy stuff. They even turned off all the lights except the ones on the Christmas tree so it could be a true 'candle-lit' dinner.
This morning I was giddy. I started listening to the kids giggle and squeal about 6:30 and try to stay quiet until 7 am. When we finally let them see what Santa brought, their reactions were priceless. Big Baby bee-lined it to the baby stroller and doll, then spent the rest of the day taking 'dollie' on walks and crashing her into things. Reagan screamed when she saw her guitar, and Tyson and Paige were jumping up and down yelling as they looked through what Santa brought. Even Molly got super excited when she saw her walker.
After that, pure pandemonium took over. For the first time ever, we had all four grandparents here and it was perfect. Big baby is the perfect age for the wonder and excitement of Christmas, especially when you add in 3 very excitable older siblings. Molly was precious. All day I just wanted to stare at her. She loved opening presents, she loved eating the presents, and she loved all the craziness around her.
If I'm being honest, I cried off and on all day long. My heart was so full and content and happy and grateful that pretty much anything set me off. It made me realize just how overwhelmingly numb I was last year. I spent all morning crying because I wasn't with Molly, then spent the afternoon crying because I was away from my other kids. My Christmas dinner was spent alone in the hospital cafeteria thinking, "Man. This is just wrong on so many levels."
Not this year. No one had the stomach flu, we were all together, and my Christmas dinner was spent with close friends and family. Things were relax and comfortable and joyful again. Molly is doing so well and our kids truly love each other. We have grown so much closer this past year and really I feel like it's been Christmas all year long for us.
While I am getting worried about Molly again and will most likely spend the day at the doctor's office getting lungs checked and seeing if we need to do a swallow study, nothing could damper the spirit and feeling of this Christmas. I really think that 20 years from now our kids will be talking about this Christmas.
So Merry Christmas to anyone still reading this little blog of mine! I hope and pray each of us find health and happiness and peace to survive it all in the upcoming year.
No comments:
Post a Comment